Adding detail Task

WALT add supporting detail/ideas to our writing
WALT write a range of correct sentence types
During the holiday, I went to the beach with my friends. We saw there was a volleyball net. We asked a family if we could borrow their volleyball. We played volleyball for about an hour then had some lunch. Before we went home, we gave the volleyball back to the family. I had a lot of fun at the beach with my friends.
Read this simple recount.
What do you notice about the recount?
I notice that there is a lot of we
What could we add to this recount to make it more detailed?
Is that adding full stops.
Edit this recount above to make it more detailed

During the holiday, I went to the sunny beach with my friends. We saw there was a volleyball net. We asked a family if we could borrow their volleyball net. they said sure you can play with it .Before we were going to play i could hear the kids playing at the park . I could smell the salty sea when we were playing .We played volleyball i could feel the ball it was hard . we played for about an hour . then we had 4 boxes of pizza for lunch it tasted so yummy . Before we went home, we gave the volleyball back to the family were it was then we thank you . after that, we packed our stuff to go back home . I had a lot of fun at the beach with my friends.